Ways To Make Your Long-Distance Marriage Work

It’s no surprise to couples that building the perfect marriage is difficult work, and is full of obstacles that they must overcome. Couples who must face the challenges of maintaining an intimate connection in a distance marriage, however, will take the award for having one of the biggest challenges to conquer in their relationship.

According to an analysis conducted in 2017 by the Statistic Brain Research Institute that 3.75 million marriages can be considered as long-distance relationships. According to the Center for the Study of Long Distance Relationships, The number of marriages that are long-distance is rising due to the increase in travel for work and dating on the internet.

The positive side is that even though it was estimated in a study that was more recent that long-distance marriages achieve an average success rate of 58 however, this isn’t less than the rate of marriages that are traditional.

What is the toughest aspect of a long-distance relationship?

Connecting with your partner is among the most difficult problems for couples in a long-distance relationship. According to research, the most challenging issue couples who live in different locations face is the feeling of not being connected to their spouse’s daily routine.  This disconnect can result in a loss of intimacy and may even damage the relationship over the course of time.

As relationships grow or die, the feeling of separation must be dealt with each day, which is very difficult for couples that are separated because of distance. Through my decades of working with couples using the Couples Synergy approach, I’ve found that those who succeed in navigating their long-distance relationship adhere to 8 practices that guarantee their success.


Here are 7 strategies to help your long-distance wedding make a difference:

1. Create with Quality Time

It is essential to spend time together in order for couples to develop their relationship.  it is suggested that couples devote 5 hours of uninterrupted time free of distractions. This is a challenge for couples living far apart, especially those who are not used to separation.

Couples living in distant locations must be innovative while spending time with each other and technology plays a major part.

One couple that we are working with holds an ongoing virtual “meeting on Fridays at a time even though they’re not physically together. They make use of this time to bond and share their idea of what is crucial for a good time spent together. Whatever they decide to do, it should be uninhibited.

2. As many senses as you can

When we’re being with someone we love, each of our senses appears to be engaged. In addition to the five traditional senses, our vision, scent, sound, taste, and touch senses are active with each moment that we spend with our spouse.

If we’re not with our spouse, as is the case of a long-distance marriage, our senses might not be stimulated enough to connect with our spouse. Couples who live in a long-distance relationship should be creative while separated and figure out ways to awaken the senses of one another. If you share a photo or audio file, given scent or food item, or something that your partner could touch with their hands These creative concepts that activate the senses of all help to build a bond.


3. Virtual Intimacy

Technology has enabled us to connect with people from all over the world at a moment’s notice. Technology has also provided new ways of expressing sexual desires and feelings between lovers even when they can’t be in the same room.

Companies such as kiiroo.com have developed apps and sexual toy designs to bring together a couple that is separated by lengthy distances, using technology to increase intimacy. Making use of phone/virtual sex to create intimate photos and sexting as well as virtual masturbation can ease the rift that couples who live far away feel from their intimate lives.

4. Letter Writing

Films have been made about couples who were separated due to distance, and how their bond was kept alive through writing letters to one another. There’s something about receiving a letter through the mail that has more significance than text messages or email. It could be something that couples who are in an extended marriage could reproduce in their relationships.

The writing of letters for your partner may bring about feelings of love that can’t be replicated by any other means of communication. Additionally, they can be reread anytime so that the sensation of being connected even if their spouse isn’t around.

5. The Fall Asleep Ensemble

The idea of sleeping on the same mattress might be something that a traditional couple considers normal, however, it is a lack of connection that could become a problem over the course of the long-distance couple.

A client that I dealt with many years ago got engaged but was cut off from his partner for six months because of work commitments. The couple started taking a nap together while watching FaceTime. He said it brought him a sense that he was calm and peace of mind when he’d awake to find his girlfriend still asleep at the front.


Technological advancements have opened up opportunities for couples living in distant locations to enjoy this intimate moment even if there is snoring an issue! In the beginning and at the end of the day, being together can leave the couple feeling the sense of belonging importance and the feeling of being connected.

6. Transparency

As we’ve mentioned One of the most challenging issues that couples living in distant locations face is the feeling of being separated from their spouses on a regular basis. If the couple isn’t conscious of what their spouse is going through because they don’t spend more time together than traditional couples, it can create anxiety and mistrust.

Based on the Center for the Study of Long Distance Relationships Long-distance couples worry more about infidelity than marriages that are traditional. If transparency isn’t the norm in their relationships, this can lead to increased anxiety and separation.

Transparency could take the way of letting your spouse know where you’re headed and who you spend time with, the things you are spending money on, and what you’re sharing through social media. It is crucial to remember that this isn’t about requesting permission or being in control by your partner but taking into consideration your partner’s needs and not letting insecurities develop.

7. Healthy Boundaries with Friends

The reality is that couples who live far away will not spend the amount of time that traditional couples do because of the physical distance. It doesn’t mean that if you live apart, you shouldn’t be isolated socially. In fact, as per research, couples who are in long-distance relationships tend to keep their distance from other people and concentrate on their work to ease any feelings of loneliness. [5]


It is essential for individuals to maintain a healthy family life, and a support network, even when they are not in the same room with their spouse. In that regard it is crucial to establish good boundaries with those you spend time with you are not with your spouse.


For instance, your spouse should be aware of who you are spending time with, as well as what you do with them. Additionally, the people whom you spend time with must have the same respect for your marriage and shouldn’t overstep any boundaries that could cause disrespect to your spouse.

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